all i want for christmas is linear thought

Today is a copy of a copy. Fill it up any possible way, build me up only to feel the pressure. Is it possible to enjoy yourself while feeling under constant pressure? I'm not used to this time, this person.
I've forgotten what it feels like to be empty and have your days melt into an unrecognizable puddle of people and thoughts. I no longer float above my body, begging to be apart of it in any way. I am this body and I can finally move.
My joints aren't a bother, I no longer despise the connection of my limbs, the movement of my legs, the ungraceful turn of a corner. I can finally say that these thoughts have become almost insignificant.
Today is another day of figuring out whether I'm allowing progression or mentally dissipating.